Just for laughs

Found some very funny websites, amusing thoughts, questions, quotations…
some of my favourites..

During Marriage ceremony why is the bridegroom is made to sit on the horse ?
He is given his last chance to run away.

Cheese….milk’s leap towards immortality.

In primitive society, when native tribes beat the ground with clubs and yelled, it was called witchcraft; today, in civilized society, it is called golf.

An alarm clock is a device that wakes you up just in time to go back to sleep.

My grandmother started walking five miles a day when she was 60. She’s 97 today and we don’t know where the hell she is.

Many adults drive more recklessly than teenagers. They’ve had more practice.

The seven ages of man have become preschooler, Pepsi generation, Baby Boomer, mid-lifer, empty-nester, senior citizen and organ donor.

Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker?

A conclusion is just the place where you got tired of thinking.

Two cows are standing in a field.One says to the other "Are you worried about Mad Cow Disease?"The other one says "No, It doesn't worry me, I'm a horse!"

Why didn’t Noah swat those two mosquitoes?

Whenever I find the key to success, someone changes the lock.

When in a queue, the other line always moves faster and the person in front of you will always have the most complex of transactions.

I earn a seven-figure salary. Unfortunately, there's a decimal point involved.

If carrots are so good for the eyes, how come I see so many dead rabbits on the highway?

Why is it that if someone tells you that there are 1 billion stars in the universe you will believe them, but if they tell you a wall has wet paint you will have to touch it to be sure?

The Republicans issued a statement today demanding that House Speaker Nancy Pelosi get back to work. President Bush would have made the statement himself, but he’s still on vacation.